I’m an awkward human. So are a lot of my friends. I am proud of it, and in fact, I embrace it. I’m weird, but I believe that if you aren’t a little weird, then you’re normal. And if everyone was normal, then we would all be the same, and that would be boring.
So here is my list of awkward things that I do, as well as the awkward people in my life. I’m writing this in hopes that we can all bond over our mutual awkwardness.
1. Tripping up the stairs.
2. Falling down the stairs in public, typically in front of a large mass of people such as the stairs down to the subway.
3. Smacking someone’s butt in the dining hall thinking it was your roommate, and it clearly wasn’t.
4. Realizing this, making a weird noise, and running away.
5. Making weird noises anytime something awkward happens. They typically sound something like this…ANGHPH.
6. The constant struggle of giving a decent high five.
7. Small talk.
8. Asking waiters or store employees a question without fumbling over your words.
9. Practicing how you are going to ask a question in class 4 times before you actually do.
10. Not having someone tell you when you have food on your face…and you walk around like that for 3 hours. Perfect.
11. “Happy Birthday!” “Thanks, you too!”
12. Pictures. Not only are you unable to ever take a nice picture, but you also always seem to have your mouth open like you are shouting…
13. Overthinking is how much you typically think. Wait. Other people don’t think this much? Huh. Weird.
14. Once you start talking, you never stop. Nor do you realize that you are talking too much.
15. You tell a story and realize half way through that it wasn’t a good story to tell in the first place.
16. You’ve become best friends with the story basket. “This is the story basket. Put that one in here so we never have to tell it again.” Thanks guys.
17. You are not responsible for your facial expressions or how they make other people feel. Sorry, that made you feel awkward? Welcome to my daily life.
18. How am I supposed to eat in public?
19. You don’t know what flirting is, how to do it, or recognize when someone is flirting with you. Typically, you just awkwardly laugh at the whole situation.
20. You avoid conflict at all costs, so everyone thinks that everything is great all the time, including the waitress that gave you chicken tenders instead of the burger you ordered.
21. Awkward people are your best friends, even if you don’t know them yet.
22. Awkward moments? An awkward life sounds like a better description.
23. Oh. Awkward. I meant to change this to 22. Not 21 things. Now it’s 23. GAH.
Have awkward moments like this too? I’m sure you’ll here more about mine throughout my daily life, so subscribe so you don’t miss it! Comment below if you think of something awkward people understand that should be added to this list!